A Set of Envelope
by Z3R0S3V3N
Summary: A week after Yamamoto return from his mission, he found a set of envelope on his desk waiting for him.


Dear Takeshi,

I'm sorry that it took me a while to reply to you. With everything that has been going on lately, I didn't think that I might have a time to actually reply to your letter.

Why would you think that I wouldn't read your letter? Only if it's from you, I would read it hundreds of times if I must. You're wrong Takeshi! It's because it's you that I want to spend every second with. You're a baseball freak, big deal. You're my baseball freak and I love you for that. Didn't I tell you this like thousands of times? For you Takeshi, I wouldn't mind if I have to repeat a hundred times more if it means expressing my undying love to you. Yes, my undying love to you. I'm not lying Takeshi, I swear by the Vongola blood in me that our love wasn't a lie. Yes, I'm expressing my undying love to you Yamamoto Takeshi. You're the one I need; you're the one for me, now and forever.

Takeshi, sitting on my desk too is a picture of us when we first started going out with each other. We were so happy back then. You don't know how sorry I am that because of me, this happen to us. I'm sorry for being so weak Takeshi. If I wasn't this weak, you wouldn't have to suffer this much. Believe me when I say I'm doing this for you, for us.

We've been going out for about nine years now; of course I remember when our anniversary is. I still believe that our love will grow strong. Do you, Takeshi? On our anniversary, I lock myself in my office refusing any visitors including her just so that I can be alone. I intentionally drown myself in paperwork to get rid of this lonely thought. I miss you so much Takeshi. I miss you so much that it hurts to see you each time without letting myself in your arms. I couldn't bear to be happy knowing that out there, you're suffering because of my weakness. I don't deserve to be happy as long as you aren't there.

Of course I remember that day silly! Reborn was being a handful trying to kill me with that insanely huge amount of paperwork but atlas, I managed to rush and escape from Reborn's demonic grasp. At first I was ecstatic to finally be able to spend the day with you but when I look at what I was holding, I became worried and jumpy. I swear you were just taking advantage of me as I hold you tight throughout the movie. My knuckles were white because I was holding on to you for my dear life. Thank you Takeshi; you comforted me after the movie ends. I even fell asleep in your arms and you had to carry me all the way to my room.

If I didn't remember about us, I wouldn't have to scold Lambo so late at night for stealing your milk again. Even when we're not together, I still make sure that there's still milk for you to drink. Don't you dare think for a second that I don't love you anymore. If you're worthless then what am I? Dame? Maybe I am dame after all, just like what they used to call me in Nami-chuu, so useless and weak, I couldn't even protect you Takeshi! Right now I'm just so full of remorse and shame. I feel so useless knowing that I couldn't find another way to protect you. I really love you Yamamoto Takeshi. Please don't think otherwise.

Takeshi, I am truly am sorry for making you feel this way. I honestly regret the actions I made that leads you to think this way. Yes, I like Kyoko since middle school. That was in the past before I really got to know you, before you show me how to love. I've talk to Kyoko sometime back when I was confused about us. You know I was happy to find out that the feelings I have for her is nothing but admiration and brotherly love; not the love I feel towards you. Dense-and-Denser huh? That didn't last long now did it? Unlike our 'fail buddies', that last until high school.

I love you Takeshi. I really do but I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, I really am so sorry. Do you have it in your heart to forgive me?

What makes you think I would show that smile to her Takeshi? That smile is only meant for you. A smile that is solely reserved for you, remember? _'Tsuna, you really have a radiant smile and I really love that smile of yours, will you smile like that for me?'_ and I replied, _'Yes Takeshi, this smile is only and just for you. Even when we're separated in death, this smile will only yearn for you.'_

Oh Takeshi, how I wish I could mend your broken heart. How I wish I could come back running to your arms and tell you everything will be alright. As much as I wish for it day and night, I'm sorry Takeshi, I just can't.

Words can't describe how much of a failure I am for not being able to be there with you when you needed me the most. Hit me Takeshi, I've been a jerk to you to leave you alone. Cut me and let me bleed dry because I now know that I don't deserve your forgiveness. I made you suffer on worse days and yet I didn't do anything to alleviate your pain.

Please Takeshi, my heart yearns for you too. I want, no, I need you back here with me. Embrace me with your love once again please Takeshi. _'I'll hold on you tightly so you won't get blown away by the winds.' _Do you remember that? Now hold me tightly Takeshi, I wouldn't want to get blown away by the wind, please.

Of course I remember going berserk just because of Lambo. Most of all, I still am bias towards you and you know it. You're my favorite guardian Yamamoto Takeshi. Only for you, I'm not all that fair and just.

No! I wouldn't lie to you Takeshi. You know that better than anyone else. Please, believe me when I say that I'm doing this for us. Even if you don't forgive me, I will do anything to protect you even though it cost me my life. I want to make amendments so just please, believe in me. I swear on the Vongolan blood in me that I would never lie to you.

I'm yours, remember that. Promise me you'll remember that I will be forever yours. Even when I'm gone, please remember me fondly Takeshi.

I'm sorry Takeshi for being so pitiful. It burns to know that you're being hurt that way. If I could, let me compensate with my heart Takeshi. Once you've cut and let me bleed dry, take my heart. It'll be glad to finally found its way back to you.

As much as you want to return back to the past and fix this, you can't Takeshi that's because I've tried. I've even asked Giannini and Shouichi and they say it is impossible. I'm sorry Takeshi. I can't believe that you fall for a wretched like me. Someone with a tainted hands and blood that is filled with sin, corruption and even bloodlust as it goes down the generation.

All this while, I held you out in the open. We kissed in the park where we used to hang out after school during high school. There is no way I would hide you or let you to hide in the dark. You don't deserve being my second because you're my first and my only. Don't you dare lie to me Yamamoto Takeshi. You're not fine living off with a bit of my love. You're much better off with all of my love. After all, I've always love you with all of my heart.

Your love can't reach me because it's already here with me. I want to reciprocate those feelings back to you but I just can't. I'm sorry. I sound really despicable and cheap right now asking for your forgiveness aren't I? That's because I love you Takeshi and you know that. Even when we're far apart can't you feel my heart that beats only for you? Please, even if it's just for a brief moment, please forgive me.

I'm glad that you love me because I love you too Takeshi with every fiber of my being. Knowing that, please don't say that I nonchalantly ask of your well being when I ask out of sincerity, care and concern.

Right now, I can feel the guilt slowly building up in me, eating me alive knowing you've spent countless of days thinking about us while I'm here throwing tantrums at everyone because I can't have you with me by my side. Now, I'm the child Takeshi throwing tantrums like there's no tomorrow. Please don't let me go. You're the only one that I have left. Even if we can't be together, please remember me and always keep me in your heart.

Yes, she doesn't know my favorite ice-cream flavor or my favorite drink. You deserve an explanation; I know you do but I just can't Takeshi. All I need is for you to believe in me. That would suffice. Do it for our sake Takeshi. I won't come out with lies just for you to be satisfied. That's a bad habit Takeshi believing in lies when you clearly deserve the truth. As much as I want to tell you the truth I can't you know that so just believe in me and hope that the storm will pass.

I know this apology does little to heal the pain that I've put you up for months now and I understand if out of a sudden you hate me and I will take full responsibility. For now, just believe in me and I promise you a future filled with laughter and happiness with or without me.

Today, tomorrow and always yours,

_Sawada Tsunayoshi._

**A/N: So that's the end of Orange Envelope. We know that Yamamoto loves Tsuna and Tsuna love Yamamoto. So what's going on? There's only one person behind this. **

**Truthfully speaking, I think my expectation for this sequel has dropped dramatically compared to my first fic which is 'I Miss You I Miss You Tsuna'. What do you think rate and review because *insertcolorhere* (sorry not gonna reveal the character) Envelope is next and I won't post it until I've reach a certain review target (sorry but I need to know what I can improve on).**

**Anyways, thank you for reading and Happy New Year! Remember I don't own KHR! If I do, it won't be shounen but shounen ai. **


End file.
